mah big day!!!!!

today is a beautiful day... the best time to express my heartfelt gratitude to everyone as i did not realize how big my yesterday was not until i saw the overwhelming number of messages that greeted me in my phone, email, twitter and facebook today...

though i miss the surprise party that my friends prepares for me (i badly miss Ash and Macoy during this days), i did not have a big party like anyone would have when they turn another decade of their life as i celebrated my bday in the most special way i knew it could be.. i chose to spend it with my cousins who were on their last day of visiting us from filo... and it was a blast indeed... a whole day of eating and laughing until they board their plane bound to manila...

therefore, i would like to start my sincere appreciation to my family, whom in their own way, made my day special.... thanks dad and tita tess for the ripcurl jacket and dunlop shoes, mah bro and sis for the sumptuous thai lunch and manay kathy and manoy wyn for the afternoon max brenner treat....

to mah family back home, thank you... mah little angelic imp, be nice to your lola ok... i love you both... tita mila and the rest of mah tito and tita, thanks for the call... it surely made mah day....


to mah kapatids whom i badly misses the most; macoy, ash, elmer, mymy and calay.. i dont know what to say, just the thought of remembering you all and what you could have done for mah bday never fails to put tears in mah eyes....

and to all my friends back home, your thoughtful messages reverberates and made me the most important person for the day... my big hugz and kisses to everyone... all you've done for mah special day really means so special to me... you all made me feel so important and loved...

i know that my birthday will just be the beginning of another year filled with happy memories, wonderful moments and shining dreams..... and i thank God for this wonderful blessing and i could not ask for more...

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!

ipis.. oh ipis....

darn! it's so good to be back... term 1 of uni life is finally over and now i can get back the 18hrs / day free time stolen by mah studies during those term... and whola! the first thing i did is to revisit all mah fave blogs and be updated with them once again...

then after reading blogs over blogs over blogs, i run through yoshke's blog (which i would say mah fave blogger) where he wrote an artistic literary about mah personal enemy... the ipis... yes oh yes!!! ipis aka cockroach... i so hate them that no matter how well i compose mahself, a mere sight of them would definitely make me scream to the top of mah lungs... so embarrassing definitely!...

and yoshke's blog dealt with the ipis in a funny way... it indeed gave me a a good laugh in the early hours of the morning...

and yes, after several months in deep slumber, i chose to come back with this article because i believe that sharing a hearty laughter with everyone is a good thing to tell that indeed i am finally back...

so happy reading everyone....

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One of my college friends called my attention to a certain blog post we posted back in the day. I’d actually forgotten about it already. But now that I’m reading it again, I just can’t help laughing. And I’m sharing it with you. However, I apologize to all my Pinoy readers as some parts are in Tagalog and I kept it that way. Translating it would just ruin it.

HOW TO TORTURE AN IPIS
by Pam Condeno

1. Pour Green Cross alcohol.
2. Get encyclopedia and drop it right on the target. Make sure it finds itself in a very AWKWARD situation where it will render itself confused, disturbed, and a bit in a vertigo state.
3. Make sure when it flies, you have an alcohol with you and swish it to make it pilay.

HOW TO KILL IPIS (especially with wings)
by KZ Ottara

1. Camouflage with the wall
2. Grab a slipper
3. ATTACK!!!
4. Step on the slipper to make piga
5. LEAVE OVERNIGHT FOR MORE FLAVOR!

HOW TO KILL COCKROACHES IN DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE HOUSE
by Reen Ladignon

1. Slam foot on ipis. (Said foot should be wearing a shoe or slipper.)
2. If ipis is on wall, take off shoe or slipper and make sapak the ipis.
3. If ipis is on kisame, get walis and swish at the ipis to make it fall down. Then proceed to number 1 or 2.
4. If Reen sees ipis while she is washing dishes outside their house, then she makes squirt-squirt it with dishwashing liquid and pours the dirty water on it. See them scatter. If ipis crawls near the hand, grab the nearest kawali and slap it on the ipis. Do nothing if it crawls down the drain.
5. If ipis is flying, grab a Baygon can and spray mercilessly towards the ipis. You will be momentarily disgusted at seeing the legs of the ipis in all their glory nearing toward you—but then you will soon have the satisfaction seeing the ipis make gewang-gewang as it falls to the ground.
All done while screaming like a headless chicken.


HOW TO MASSACRE A COCKROACH
(with illustrations which unfortunately cannot be replicated here)
by Glenn Ituriaga

1) Grab the ipis by the feelers.
2) Make hulog the ipis in a bottle of muriatic acid. Plug the bottle.
3) Turn the bottle upside-down and watch the ipis slowly melt away…

YOU’RE SO KADIRS (An Open Letter to an Ipis)
by Ace Mella

Bago mag-alas nueve ng gabi…

Oh ipis. You’re so kadirs. That’s why I can’t touch you. That’s why I can’t get near you. That’s why I can’t make buhos the Green Cross, make tapak the you, make hampas, make sabon, make tunaw, not even make hawak.

All I can do is stare while you crawl oh so near, wishing so hard that thou shall not go super near as in almost touching the skin of mine. ‘Coz you’re so kadirs.

But despite this what I said when thou tries to invade the privacy of mine, for example, making paramdam whilst I speaking on the phone, especially during the wee hours of the night, I shall summon all courageousness of mine, grab a shoe, a slipper, or a frying pan, and smash thee and all thy kadiriness.

Only wish the I that thy green juiciness shall not dikit on the murder weapon of mine.

‘Coz you’re so kadirs.

Always,
Ace

HOW I KILLED 3 COCKROACHES, A Poem
by Pam Condeno, the Ipis Queen

Heavy rain made the ipises come out
13 arrived at my house
Big, fat, flying ipises bombarded it
So I got 3 encyclopedias
But first I wore my Jazz Pants
Then my jacket with the hood and then I cried
Got the Green Cross alcohol and
Dropped it onto the ipises
So they were all SMASHED.

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so how will you kill your ipis??? :-)